The Hardest Part of Being a Parent…Giving Up Control

Being a parent when your children are young can have some very rewarding moments. The belly laugh that makes your heart warm. The giant two arm bear hug that shows unconditional love. The pride they have when they finally figure out something they have been trying to master for a while. Watching them develop their own personality, uniquely designed by God.

But being a parent when your children are young also has its difficult moments. Nights when you are exhausted but your baby just won’t sleep. Days when you feel like you have no more patience left and they have another tantrum over what seems like something meaningless. Mealtimes when you just want them to eat one bite of a vegetable (or something green and somewhat healthy).

To this day, there was one thing that was the HARDEST thing I had to do as a parent of a young child…POTTY TRAINING. It wasn’t the hardest because it was complicated to teach or because it took a long time to get through (although in the moment it did feel like an eternity). It was difficult because it required me to give up the little bit of control that I felt I had. Control around my daily schedule. Control on clean clothes and even more importantly clean carpet, furniture, car seats, etc. Control that I had to hand over to my child that was growing up and becoming more independent. And that is what made it one of the hardest moments for me.

Yet the really great thing about potty training is that it also gave me a chance to talk with them about God. I was able to take these moments and have some great conversations with them.

When I was sitting on the floor in the bathroom with them while they were trying to “see if they could go” we would talk about how God was helping them grow to be a big boy or girl. And we would talk about how God designed them to be able to learn this at this very time. And we would pray that we would be patient during the process and for their success.

When I was changing their clothes for the 5th time that day because of yet another accident, I was also able to talk with them about how God was patient and so was I. We would talk about how we sometimes make mistakes but with God’s grace we are able to start over and try again. And we would pray that God would give them wisdom to know when it was time to go before it was too late.

The good news, I did make it through potty training with all four children. I realized that my struggle to give up control was really about trusting them and giving them that freedom to make a mistake and to try again. Isn’t this what God allows from us all the time?

If you are going through potty training right now or about to, please allow me to pray for you,

Dear God, please be with this sweet parent who is working with their child to figure out how to use the potty like a big girl or boy. Please provide this mom or dad with a patience that surpasses all understanding. Please be with their child to learn to listen to their body signals to know when they have to go. Help them to understand that learning takes time and making mistakes is okay. Most importantly give this parent what they need to trust You and to give up control of this small part of their child’s life. Amen.

Have a funny potty training story? Feel free to leave a comment about it or ask me a question if you aren’t sure about how to approach toilet training.

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Also be on the look out for my next blog where I will talk about moments while feeding/eating.